Angry, annoyed, wondering, rethinking… recurrently.
Why? Why must we ever? Why don’t we ever… (stop)
The cycle of reading and hitting dead bottom when you seek results.
Is it just you? Or is it the system?
None to really blame as neither made school.
Or did the system self-exist? Nope, it’s not God;
God is the only Yahweh. None like Him – or so I believe.
Why must we ever? Why do we ever have to… (sigh)
Prove ourselves by meticulously designed and conceived interrogations;
Contexualised with an envisioning of strengthening the mind to think?
Strengthening the mind to ameliorate the analytical situations created to boggle it, and then what!
To think through?
My pen is angry and wrath is on my paper.
Fire burns at the tip of my pen to blaze and tear away my bitter thoughts from me, o dear script!
If my mind won’t contain the emotions I feel all at once;
Maybe sinking in the blanks of a plain paper plane I can throw;
Maybe in there I can cause all to fly away.
Hard work? Talent? Primary school said I had it all.
Intellect? Constructive thinking? Secondary said I passed.
What does Tertiary have to say?
Hold up! I never quite learnt it all; or what you say?
Were grades not showing improvement in me all along?
Were they just cheering me on till the harder stages?
Till I fall out? Break down? Fall out yet again till I’m out of love with myself?
To the end where I wall off excellence and embrace mediocrity?
The answers It says to me, are those:
They of whom with all the pits, construct houses on top;
Those are the real ones. ‘The OGs’.
I might eventually tear up! This script- not me; (haha)
There’ll be much shame if I tear down than in simply tearing a heavy-burdened paper to pieces.
It makes sense actually to light up this negativity with my pen-torch. (excuse pun)
In life, are many disappointments. One of which is in living life itself.
Living life as a medical student? Well that doesn’t sound too disappointing at all!
But wait till you’re living it before you bend an ear to that exclaim.
I have spoken in 37 poem lines… my chronic burden.